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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27711767">Feel What You Feel</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/willowoak_walker/pseuds/willowoak_walker'>willowoak_walker</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Star Wars Prequel Trilogy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Gen, Grief, Grieving, Jedi Religion, Qui-Gon Jinn is dead, Qui-Gon Jinn not positive, mace windu is a good person, yoda's advice is not always perfect</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 15:21:13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>594</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27711767</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/willowoak_walker/pseuds/willowoak_walker</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Mace Windu offers comfort to a grieving friend.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Obi-Wan Kenobi &amp; Mace Windu, Qui-Gon Jinn &amp; Obi-Wan Kenobi</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>160</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Feel What You Feel</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><ul class="associations">
      <li>For <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/blackkat/gifts">blackkat</a>.</li>



    </ul></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Obi-Wan,” Master Windu says, and gestures him over. Obi-Wan warily takes a seat across the artificial stream from him. Master Windu nods politely and goes back to his meditation, to all outward senses completely uninterested in Obi-Wan. Obi-Wan forces his shoulders to relax. It’s another kriffing test.</p><p>He’ll prove that he can teach Anakin.</p><p>He sits in silence, counting breaths.</p><p>“Please be patient with me,” Master Windu says, breaking the peace Obi-Wan had managed to gather. “I’m not eloquent, like you.”</p><p>“What?” Obi-Wan says, startled out of any eloquence he might possess.</p><p>“I miss Qui-Gon,” Master Windu says. “I know this must be very hard for you, and I’m sorry.”</p><p>“Master Jinn is one with the Force,” Obi-Wan says, reflexive.</p><p>“Yes,” Master Windu says, “But we aren’t, and that hurts. Let – let me use a metaphor?”</p><p>Obi-Wan nods, dumbly.</p><p>“Losing someone you care for is like having giant pits appear in every path you have to walk.” Master Windu makes a little gesture with one hand. “You can climb through them, or fall into them, or get lost in them, but you can’t pretend they aren’t there. Jedi can use the Force to jump over pits.”</p><p>Obi-Wan nods again.</p><p>“But we don’t start teaching the younglings that by just… putting a pit in front of them and telling them to jump.” Master Windu takes a slow, meditative breath. “We start teaching them by teaching them how to feel the Force in themselves and their environment. So they know where the pits are. And we work up to jumping over them.”</p><p>“I’m not a youngling,” Obi-Wan says, keeping his voice level.</p><p>“No,” Master Windu says, and nods. “But grief isn’t really pits. And it’s hard to teach people how to deal with loss, because every loss is new, and different, and has to be dealt with as a new thing.”</p><p>“Master Yoda says,” Obi-Wan starts, and cuts himself off as Master Windu shakes his head.</p><p>“Master Yoda is very wise,” Master Windu says, “And he’s a very good teacher. About everything but this.”</p><p>Obi-Wan blinks. “What makes you say that?”</p><p>“I recognize the problems because I have them,” Master Windu says wryly, “I can’t teach the basics of lightsaber form, because I’ve gotten so good at synthesizing and improvising that I don’t consciously have a handle on what the basics are any more. Master Yoda has that problem with dealing with grief.”</p><p>“He’s too good at doing it to teach it?”</p><p>“Exactly,” Master Windu says, “He forgets to start at the beginning.”</p><p>“What’s the beginning?” Obi-Wan asks, trying not to get his hopes up.</p><p>“Act like a youngling again, and spend the time working out how you feel,” Master Windu says. “Acknowledge all of your tangled and messy emotions, separate them out, and probably have a good cry.”</p><p>“-But,” Obi-Wan says, “I should be beyond that.”</p><p>Master Windu shrugs. “Without understanding our emotions, we can’t account for them or process them. It’s the foundation upon which our practice builds. Is there ever any need for shame in going back to the foundation?”</p><p>“No,” Obi-Wan says. “But-” He pauses, frowning. <em>But what?</em><span> “</span><span>But shouldn’t I be over this by now? Master Jinn,</span><span>” </span><span>his breath catches, “Master Jinn always said to focus on the present.”</span></p><p>“Your emotions are part of the present,” Master Windu says. “And so is Qui-Gon’s absence. He isn’t with us in the material world any more, and we feel things about that.” He holds out his hands across the little stream. “Meditate with me, Obi-Wan. Feel what you feel.”</p><p>
  <span>Obi-Wan bursts into tears.</span>
</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Mace Windu here is inspired by Blackkat's work and analysis of canon.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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